frugality and thankfulness
31 DecThis year has marked the change from frugal living being a mild annoyance to it being an art form. Gone are the daily indulgences and in are the multipurpose, multi use items. I’ve used old clothes to patch newer ones, cordeuroy makes an especially nice patch, btw. I can stretch one meal’s parts into at least three meals now. I have bought perhaps a total of 100 dollars in clothing for myself and yet have managed to donate to charity as well. I have learned to ask for hand me downs, and to coupon clip. I’ve spent an extra 30 minutes at the grocery each week comparing coupons and have saved as much as 125 dollars in one trip. The need for this frugality has to end, and fast, but the habits developed will be forever.
For example: x mas eve appetizers/dinner: garlic mashed potatoes, leg of lamb, gravy veggie tray, ham biscuits, asparagus, mac and cheese. The biscuits were homemade, the ham, frozen leftovers from an earlier meal. The lamb and gravy became lamb and celery stew with some celery left from the veggie tray. The asparagus became the base for an eggs benedict with a veggie base instead of bread. The REST of the lamb is in the freezer for an irish lamb stew in january. The veggie tray became veggie and beef stew with the addition of V8 and 1/2 lb ground beef, the potatoes have been potato cakes for two meals and will combine with the ground beef left over from the stew to make a dinner casserole. The biscuits and ham leftovers became breakfast, there was enough leftover veggie soup to freeze to become the base for another stew or spaghetti sauce. The mac and cheese was served with sandwiches and salads as lunch more than once. So one day’s food to feed 9 became 10 days worth of meals made of leftovers interspersed with bits of fresh veggies here and there. I’m pretty proud of that.
Did you know that you can clean the entire house from top to bottom with white vinegar, baking soda and murphy’s oil soap? Or that white vinegar makes a dandy fabric rinse? My compost is overflowing with the recycyled food and yard scraps and warm bedclothes are easily made from old clothes. Old soft sheets are easily mended with a darning stitch on my sewing machine and a new coat of paint can make things feel new again.
I’m also embarrassed. There was once a time when I looked at some girlfriends and wondered things like, she’s such a pretty girl, why does she dress like that? ( Jeans and t shirts) Now I know, because having a relatively stylish wardrobe costs money I don’t have! Some things are recycled into other outfits, but some are just too dated.
I’m learning to make do. Plain and simple. Grant’s school projects have been a crazy challenge to make do with what we have at home. He made geese out of my old jewelry making supplies for a presentation of canada geese. Written stories have replaces posterboard projects where they could and he is learning how to make do and becoming an amazing writer as well. Caleb is not old enough to know any different.
The dishwasher no longer works well so we hand wash the dishes. the water bill has dropped. The clothes washer no longer advances itself, so I do it manually. These things will be fixed one day but not now. We closed out the rented storage shed when Chuck closed in a part of the garage with riped down two by fours and plastic sheeting. Then he built doors for the garage.
We have survived for the better portion of the year on my tiny income. We rarely eat out or go out, but have learned to pitch a tent in the yard and dig a fire pit when we need a vacation. For parties we provide the place and ask others to bring munchies and props. One day money will be easier, it has to be to continue to survive, but I’m proud to have made it this far under such dire circumstances.
Before it got so dire we got a new puppy and he has been the best addition of all. I’m glad money didn’t stop us then. Even the horrid haircut from hell became christmas gifts when I bought great candles with the gift certificate I bargained for after the deed was done. Chuck has learned to cook, we stopped buying pre packaged stuff routinely and do most from scratch. i think it is healthier. I know my kids are learning things I never learned. And I had to pause and laugh when Grant asked, ” Mom, what is a microwave?” I recall a time in my life when I wondered the very same thing.
My children have had almost a whole year with their father at home with them. How many kids get that kind of time and attention from Dad? I hardly even saw my Dad as a kid because he worked so much. Chuck has mostly recovered from his worst chrons symptoms and I am thankful for that as well. He set limits on how the craziness in his family will affect us. He told his Mom very specific things she needs to change. He is working hard to advocate for our mental health even when our fiscal health is something he cannot fix right now. I oftten come home to candles burning and dinner warmed up. Even on occasion a bath is drawn for me. He’s not a domestic guy but has risen to the occasion pretty well.
Caleb has a bowling party for his birthday yesterday, and we had a great time. Small group, all we could afford, but the best kind of birthday, surrounded by love and laughter.
I’m also thankful for having been a bit of a packrat all my life. It is easier to make do when you have something to make do with 🙂
We both have interviews in the coming weeks to find a higher source of income. I love my job now, but there is a need for more income that it can provide. There is a DON job out there that might be mine and a couple of sales jobs chuck has interviewed for. Chuck returning to work would be the best solution, but we will make do with what comes down the pipe. As a DON I could likely support us successfully.
It has been another very hard year, but a good one in many ways. My brother has moved home, My Dad is settled and happy in his new home, we all are healthy. We had a rare whole family reunion just before Xmas, including my cousin who was a Marine in Iraq for the last few attempts. Chuck was missing from the last one too. All of us were in attendance this time and I really loved seeing four generations smiling and laughing together. I do have arthritis, but it is the gentler osteo kind not the joint deforming rheumatioid type. And it has been a pleasantly humbling experience to ask for help from the men in my family. ( I was always a bit over the top with the “I can do it myself ” stuff anyway )
And every so often I see a yellow Harley, a lovely corset or a burlesque show and recall that there are people who very much want me to thrive in the coming year. And Mom? I put your wool runner in the hall upstairs. I know it is too “good” a rug to use with wild boys and leaky dogs in the house, but it makes me feel good to cross it each evening on my way to bed. And Nana? Your fern stand stands near a window in the same hall with a pretty green plant on top. We talk to you regularly when riding in Leona and the children know stories about each of you. Meme? I wear your rings proudly and have your picture at my bedside. Bill? The children know your face from photographs and Caleb makes up stories of things you ” did” with him. Grandaddy, we tell your stories while fishing on the dock. We have angels living and angels beyond too.
I pray this is the year that we will begin to make visible strides in repairing the past damage and truly moving into where we want to be.
One Woman Journey 